Grover Anderson is not actually The Guy Who Brings the Yo-Yos To Your Elementary School, despite what one very kind commenter on YouTube believes. But he is happy to dip back into his well of story songs, recalling the professional yo-yoers who visited school assemblies, selling toys under the guise of teaching kids about perseverance and strength. “It started off being about how much I hated this guy, but ended up being a thinly veiled metaphor about my career as a songwriter,” Anderson says. Yes, the gig might not always be glamorous, and, yes, being an entertainer has its ups and downs — but, in the end, once you find something you love that keeps you on dreaming, you don’t let it go.
Hello friends! I’m excited to share the first of many singles that are coming out in 2024…”The Guy Who Brings The Yo-Yos To Your Elementary School.” Yes, the title is long, and yes, the song is ridiculous. But I swear that, as a child, I attended multiple school assemblies where a motivational speaker did cool yo-yo tricks and told us that we could achieve anything (and also asked if we wanted to buy the yo-yos he had with him.) One day in 2022 I tweeted something stupid and innocuous, and for whatever reason I couldn’t get the thought out of my head:
“Howdy folks I’m Grover Anderson, and just because we’re from CA that don’t mean we ain’t country. It’s a way of life, not a place on a map, am I right? Anyway, we’re gonna play you a new one, a ballad from the POV of the guy who did those yo-yo assemblies at elementary schools.”
— Grover Anderson (@iamsupergrover) March 6, 2022
I probably should have let the idea die here, but my brain just doesn’t work that way. I think I took it as a challenge. The song went through quite a few drafts, both lyrically and in musical arrangement (Marshall really helped me unlock the music for this one with the chorus key-change.) It’s also got the f-word in it, which is not something I ever thought I’d put in a song, but it was really important to me that this person who speaks to children for a living have a potty mouth in private.
I wrote the lyrics, Marshall Henry & I wrote the music. Marshall plays guitars and keyboards, Dave Duggan played bass, and Owen Ragland plays the fiddle. The song was mixed by Michael Clebanoff, and the single artwork was created by Rebecca Hungerford.
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I am the guy who brings the yo-yos to your elementary school You sit cross legged in the gym Me and my headset mic will wow your friends With ball bearings and string And you can buy one on a whim For only 16 of your parents' hard earned dollars I will teach you how to walk the dog and sleep all on your own Then at 3:15 I'll pack the unsold Fireballs into my trunk And Breakaway to my next hotel home I've loved fourteen third grade teachers In eleven different counties All along the I-5 corridor, and still None of that compares to watching eyes fill up with wonder Dreaming they can bend this plastic to their will This can't last forever, but it don't get much better Guess I have to hope that it will When I was nineteen a recruiter showed up at my college After my last basketball game She said "Congrats you're done with Ju Co "Hey I loved the way you positively motivate your team "I bet in three months I can harness your dexterity "And teach you all the fine points of our spiel" She was right and by the time that I turned twenty I spoke daily and expensed all of my meals Now I'm 32 and I can sleepwalk through my speech Even hungover I can hit all of my moves But every parent hates me and nobody wants to date The Pied Piper of public elementary schools This can't last forever, but it don't get much better I don't know what else I can do Like a vampire for the kids' attention Thriving on their stupid questions Roll your eyes Their love's so fucking true Could I live a life that's stable? Punch the clock and rock the cradle? Is this string around me like a noose? This can't last forever, but it don't get much better I don't know what else I can do I don't know what else I can do
More singles coming soon! (The subject matter on the rest of them is much more traditional.) Stay tuned, and if you want to keep up with them please consider following me on the streaming service of your choice.